gwynvir’s blog

Happy Anniversary to my parents - 37 years so far.

I was 204 when I woke up this morning! That's the lowest number I've seen!  So I'm in a good mood this morning, and hopeful.  I went up to 17 units last night and injected in my thigh because I heard that would slow the absorption.

I had to go home yesterday around 4 because I was feeling loopy.  I have no idea what brought that on, but I don't want to do it again.  I drove home repeating "awake and alert" to myself so I wouldn't get distracted and fainty while I was driving.  I fell asleep for about 2 hours, just crashed.  Jimmy came home and took my blood sugar to make sure I was okay - I was high, around 370, but that's because the nurse I called told me to eat some raisins and I had a graham cracker too.

This is all going to take some getting used to.

Anyway, mom and dad sent me some beautiful flowers yesterday, with "Hope this brightens your day as much as you brighten ours".  It really did.  I was completely surprised and it's amazing how overjoyed flowers can make you feel.

Got the guest towel hanger hung, still need to hang the other curtains in the dining room & get Jeremy's room vacuumed & bookified.

Well, woke up with really high blood sugar and got a little down.  I called the dr to see if I should up the insulin but they haven't called back yet.

I put up the curtains in Jeremy's room last night, still need to put up some more hardware in the bathroom and get all the boxes out of there. Oh, also need to wash the new sheets.

Wow I have a lot to do before the party.

We went up Little Cottonwood this weekend with Britt & John.  We packed enough gear to last us a while even though we were just heading up 40 min. out of the city, which made Jimmy laugh, but it made us comfortable!  I got to use my air mattress for the first time and I don't believe I'll ever go camping without it again.

It was an interesting time since everyone was a little concerned about me eating the wrong things, etc. and I didn't have any insulin because I didn't want my first pokey to be up camping, so I just ate as right as I could and didn't drink as much as I usually do.  I still drank more than I should have, probably, but I paced it.  Plus, my blood sugar kept going down the more wine I had!  I'm sure that's healthy.  It was fun watching everyone around me get drunk, though.  I was only grumpy for a little bit of it. 

I'm really hoping that getting my blood sugar down where it needs to be will make me a happier person. Saturday morning I threw a tantrum and kicked things because we were out of milk for my coffee.  Seriously.  And then yesterday I couldn't get a towel bar screwed in and Jimmy had to come fix it, and then I tried to hang another curtain rod and thought I messed it up and I just lost it.  Went sobbing to Jimmy about how I couldn't do anything right, and then I just went and cried on the bed for about 1/2 hour.  That calmed me down a lot and I was able to focus after that.

I think yesterday's was mostly just tiredness and me being scared about having to inject myself for the first time.  PLUS all the hormones from starting my period yesterday.  I'm just glad Jimmy's so understanding and patient while I'm being all wild. 

So yeah, I got to inject myself last night.  Took my BG and it was 327, then filled my syringe and just stared at it for a while.  Grabbed some belly fat and started aiming but just couldn't do it. I tried for it about 3 times and whined about how I couldn't do it, and Jimmy just soothingly told me that I could, and then I was able to.  That teeny needle just slipped right in.  It's weird, but not as ... intrusive ... as I thought it was going to be.  So that's done, and having the first time out of the way is so relieving.  1/2 hour later I was down to 279, and then this morning 211.

I'm currently hovering around 140, and I'm hoping to stay there - once Jeremy leaves we'll be able to get on a schedule of working out & eating right.

Whee.

Morning: woke up with 211 BG.

Decided not to eat breakfast, just had some coffee with skim milk & sugar-free caramel flavoring.  That still bumped me up to 225 when I tested at 9:30.  *grimace*

Now I'm hungry, though, and I'm having a banana, some scrambled eggs, and bacon:

banana: about 29g of carbs, 21g of sugar
scrambled eggs: about 2g of carbs
bacon: about .2g of carbs

Breakfast:  about 33g of carbs.  Is this good?

I've always thought that things were going just a leeeetle bit too well.  I love everything about my life right now - my partner, my house, my job, my future, my kitties - bloody everything.  It's really been fantastic the past few months and I've been reveling in it.

But today, I got diagnosed with diabetes.  It was just from a urine sample, so I don't know what kind.  Honestly, I'm hoping it's a mis-diagnosis and maybe I'm just pregnant.  But after looking around on a bunch of sites about diabetes, and then looking around on a bunch of sites on pregnancy, I have to sadly agree with the doctor. (But here's hopin'!)

I'm currently fasting so that they can test my blood tomorrow and tell me which kind I have and right now I'm allowing myself to be broody and self-indulgent so I can try to get it out of my system.  I cried for a bit, because I feel broken, but this is just a condition, something I have to live with, something I can live with, so out of all the crazy things that could have been causing weight loss and dehydration, diabetes is better than cancer. 

Doesn't make it any easier to accept, though. 

Jimmy's been wonderful - he is by my side, as they say - he's cleaning out the back room so we can use it for an exercise room and we're going to go over recipes that I can have - a lot's going to change in the next couple of weeks.  I can't drink while taking the medication, and I'll be taking the medication until I can get my weight (I'm 140!) down about 15 pounds and can maybe just go to a controlled diet instead of medication.

*sigh*

More to come.

My divorce is final!  I almost completely have my name back! 

I started my new job last week and I think I'll get the hang of it.

Jimmy's at Defcon right now and I have the house to myself, I'm waiting for my couch to be delivered, having some eggs & bacon.

I just tried to die and coughed up some bacon.  I decided to give the coughed-up bacon bits to Thistle.

I'm almost done painting.  I think I"ll touch up some of the red and call it done.  I'm ready to move in.

I need to call Jimmy's parents about the desk.

Jimmy VNCs into his machine from work so he can maintain his site and sometimes, when he leaves the speakers on, I can hear all the little sounds his computer makes when he's sending messages or ftping or whatnot.

I was IMing him a bit ago and mentioned that I could hear the noises and now he's DJing from work and playing our songs.

Goddamn I'm lucky.

I just had to chronicle the amazing weekend Jimmy and I had.

Friday after work, we had decided to do a date night, but since Jimmy doesn't get home from work until 9:30, our choices were limited.  We decided to just go out and see what we could find.

We went out to Bonneville Glen Park, which was GREAT!  When I first moved here, I went walking a lot at night, and I had passed by this park on one of my wanderings, but was never able to find it again.  Here, 7 years later, Jimmy reintroduced it to me.  We walked around a bit and resolved to come back in the daytime to really explore.  Afterwards, I was thirsty, so we stopped by Albertson's to pick up some cups (this is becoming a habit, we last did it last October and got some fun Halloween cups) and silly straws so we could stop by Artesian Well Park (on about 8th S and 5th E) to get some fresh water.  While we were at the store, we spied these helpful learning tools for youngsters:

We sat out in the perfect spring night and drank our fresh spring water through our Little Mermaid and Spiderman silly straws.  The straws ended up making out a little later.  Silly kids.

Saturday we finally made it up to the Sun & Moon Cafe, up Emigration Canyon, and had a great brunch.  Stopped by Koi so I could get some new jewelry for my nose, and I ended up getting a ring.  I had avoided getting one because the piercing is pretty high up and only a large ring would fit, but there's a new type of ring (can't remember what it's called) that fits just fine.  Jimmy's got a picture of that (along with my purty, purty henna):

We then stopped by FYE and got stuck in their used section.  I got some Tom Waits, Death in Vegas, Jesus & Mary Chain, Galaxie 500, Snow Patrol, and some others I can't think of right now.  Jimmy loaded up too.  From there, we went home and got some sunscreen and water and headed out to the Japanese Festival that was down in what used to be "Japantown" here.  It was small, but interesting - lots of martial arts displays and some great WWII history and food.  Too bad we ate before we went.

Then went home and I passed out while Jimmy ran Zero Content.  Steve and Jimmy then spent the rest of the night wrangling the wires for the swamp cooler thermostat.  Who knew there was such a thing?

Sunday was our Lunaversary, so we wanted to do something special.  We were going to go the the Atlantic to get some Mediterranean food, but they were closed so we just wandered around downtown, saw some cool stencils, found an alley that was an art installation and had the word "love" in, I think, 32 different languages engraved in random bricks throughout the alleyway. 

We decided to get some sushi, and I needed an Apache book anyway since I'm trying to get better at system administration, so we went to the Gateway.  We watched kids get crazy in the fountains, found a great sale at *whisper*Hot Topic*whisper* and ate at the Happy Sumo. 

Our big date was to make a really complicated dinner, and we succeeded.  We made:

Spring Rolls with Soy-Ginger Dipping Sauce
Sesame Jasmine Rice with Edamame
Tuna Teriyaki with Wasabi Butter
Five-Spice Fortune Cookies
Most of the fun there was making the fortunes to put in side.  *grin*

Everything turned out great, we watched a couple of episodes of Babylon 5, and crashed so Jimmy could get up and have his second interview.

Which, I just heard, went really well.  Here's hoping they call that one more time ...

What are the weirdest song titles in your playlist or music collection?
Submitted by Charline.

"Cherry Colored Funk" - Cocteau Twins
"A Fistful of Oysters" - Zydepunks
"Zeus No Like Techno" - Banco de Gaia
"Bell Bottomed Tear" - The Beautiful South
"A Girl Doesn't Get Killed by a Make-Belive Lover... 'Cuz It's Hot" - My Life With the Thrill Kill Kult
"And Even The Vegetables Scream" - Legendary Pink Dots
Anything by the Dead Milkmen

Eh.  There are lots of little weird titles.

One of the strangest songs I have is Bevis Frond's "Dead of Night".